R.I.P my dearest granny

i will NEVER EVER wanna write this post,
i've never ever thought that i will write this post after my previous post,
it just a month ago,
when i was writing the previous post,
tears were running through my face.
now,
when i am writing this post,
tears just flooded over my face.

1st photo took in my new camera phone
never ever thought it would be the last photo of her
which i can capture for her
i miss her so much
she's gone for almost 2 weeks
she already left us for almost 2 weeks
i miss her in every moment
I wonder how is she now?
I wonder is she doing good?
I wonder did god really take good care of her now?
there are just so many wonders in my mind
im a selfish grandchild
eventhough i knew that
she's in hospital
but i didnt rush back in time
eventhough i knew that
she wanted me by her side
but i didnt be by her side for most of the time
She's looking for me during the last day she's alive
but im just too far away from her
i left her
after seeing her for just less than 10 minutes
what a SELFISH me
what a BAD grandchild me
i've regretted for not accompanying by her side for longer period
I really REGRETTED
but it's just too LATE
im just so sorry to her

i should have accompany her
but it just too late to say this now
sleeping beside her
during the last night that she will be with us
was the last thing that i can do
to accompany her
knew that she's afraid to be alone
that's why i stay beside her for that night
just to accompany her for her last journey with us
usually she will always ask me to stay with her
most of the time i rejected
and only a few times i stayed with her
she took good care of me when i stayed
but that night was the last night i stayed with her
and she was not able to take care of me anymore
grandpa had took her away
seeing her lying in an icy coffin
i wish that she could hear me
i really wish to
i have so much to say to her
i have so much to do with her
but yet it's just too late
now,everytime went back to her house
i miss her voice
which always ask me am i hungry?
when is your holiday?
not gonna stay with popo tonight?
i miss these
i seriously miss these
maybe God wanna took her away from those painness
maybe God don't want her to suffer anymore
maybe grandpa knew that she was afraid of those sufferings
that's why they took her away
may God really take good care of her
may grandpa really protect her wife in their world
Popo,
i wish that i could be your granddaughter again
in the next life
i'm glad to have you, popo
婆婆，您辛苦了~
祝您，一路顺风~
好好跟着阿公享受二人世界吧~

树欲静而风不止，子欲养而亲不待

now i could really deeply understand this chinese idiom
that kind of regret is just undescribable
please appreciate the one you loved
be greatful when they are still here

God, please bless her in every moment

It's holiday next week~
but i'm not in holiday mood
it's not a holiday at all
assignments,homeworks,reports
all filled up my time
it's very busy
a superb busy life~
so sorry that i didn't go home
so sorry that i'm busying with my stuffs
received a bad news few days ago
currently, stress + sad + worry mood
all mixed up
i wish i had more time
i wish i could go back home now
i wish i could visit my dear granny now
i wish i had more time to accompany her
i know it will be kinda lonely and scary
to stay in medical centre alone
but i can't leave n go to her
DAMN ! busy life
all i can do was just
PRAY, I PRAY! PRAY HARD that
GOD, BLESS HER
may GOD really bless her
may GOD lead her to a healthier,better tomorrow

a NEW stage - tougher challenges

WEEEE!
start with a good picture
1st time playing ipad..
not mine..haha
addicted to it..duhhh...hehe..
夜深了，但睡不着，
虽然明天有早课，
还是手痒要上网。
偶尔，用华语写部落格
真的能抒发更多的感情（好像很感性酱）
人生的另个阶段的开始，
像个婴儿刚学走路，
偶尔也会跌跌撞撞。
但是，我也得坚强的爬起来，
努力的往前跑，甚至是飞。
不管周围是怎么样，
先得做好自己。
不管别人怎么比你好，
先得把自己做好。
别人比你优秀，
就向别人的优点学习，
把自己提升更上一城楼。
虽然过程很累，
也不可气馁。
我得做好自己，
永不放弃。
勇闯每个障碍，
找到更好的未来！
向目标勇往直前吧！

it's time 2 "breath"

it's been some time

that I was living in

the "dusty and complicated"

atmosphere

well, sometimes i just need something like this

~ the nature

to refresh my mind =)

something green,

something fresh,

something peaceful,

to take away

my worries,

my sorrows,

my stupid thoughts as well =)

obviously,my "yo-yo" pose was failed..

xD

Due to the lil short fingers..HA!

a "monkey"

trying to pose with that

steel thingy

OBVIOUSLY,

it's a stupid pose!

haha!

weeee!

we're on TOP of the city

(kononnya)

HAHAHA!

trying to leave that heavy stuff up?

I'VE MADE IT K?

XD

well, that umbrella is really a "disaster"

xD

my face was as red as "guan gong" as well

haha!

it's normal phenomenon4 me..hehe

i'm really MADDDDDDDD!

ignore the sweat!

xD

Feel the freedom

a kind of release

that clear my mind for a moment

A moment in TIME~

(moment- westlife)

haha! this song is nice anyway =)

In a GOOD MOOD!

GOOD MOOD
GOOD MOOD
finally come to me
haha~
a relaxing wednesday
only have one class in the morning
got myself a GOOD breakfast
got myself a GOOD walk
got myself a GOOD nap
it is just because
I don't feel like doing anything at this moment
=.= lazy betol...haha
hardly ever have this kind of relaxing moment
since a long long time ago~
next week is my trials
few more weeks is my finals!
COME ON!
GOTTA PUT ALL MY EFFORT!
YO!
不管了！
有的没的，我全都给你拼了！
人生没有多少的读书时光，
就算单独没人陪，
也得过得精彩，
要不，如何对得起自己呢？
haha~
i feel great,
im in my own world while writing this,
sitting opposite2 the window,
feeling the touch of the sunlight
and the afternoon breeze blowing through my face...
it's great sometimes =)
all my worries had gone with the wind in a moment
^.^

有时候,it just really dumb

it's been a looonnnggg time i didnt write my blog~
Coz i don't really want to write,
and i dont really have the mood at all.
Busy with all the stuffs like hell...
i think so..
coz just end my 1 week holiday...
doing nothing...
kinda wasting my time actually...
i admit this sem i had lost my study passion ( a lot)
im so lazy =.=
WHAT THE HELL AM I DOING?!!!
我好像变成了一个“懦弱”的人了
以往那个有话直说的，
什么屁都乱放的我，
不见了！
有时候，可以说是常常吧，
脑里是想到一些想说的话，
想说但也算了吧，
没人会听我的“废话”~
有时候却说话说得更直更过火了，
怎么了，
怎么会变如此的我？
算了吧，
还是选择不管了，
不管别人了，
别人干什么屁事，
也不关我的事！
何必将在意？
在意一些有的没的的“屁事”.
I'm gonna end all these stupid stuffs...
gonna focus on my own world~
i wanna look 4 my passion...
My passions for everything~
not just trouble myself with nonsense ANYMORE!
Im gonna find back WHO I AM!

OH! cacat timetable~

HAIZ~~~~

at first,my timetable just nice~

that's wat i want~

yam gong!

never thought that it would change again ==

yee~

my ad maths class only 5 little "kitty"

so they CLOSED the class

what?!!!

not fair leh~~~ yerr~

change to the only ad maths class in this sem ==

early morning for the day

would be ADVANCED MATHS class~

terpaksa change my chem class AGAIN!

hey,i prefer chem in the early morning!

coz my chem is bad =(

when chem lecturer ungkit bout it in the class

makes me feel sad n curious y it's like tat =(

gek sam~

luckily got the same lecturer for chem =)

erm..i kinda like her more now coz she's not showing

bad mood face now..haha..

she used to be in bad mood in last sem coz the earliest class

n all blur blur.. xD

hope i won't sleep in her class

coz OH MY GOD!

the "cute" ms LEE(my ex ad maths lecturer)

tundakan my chem class the last

== the sleepiest period..zha dou~

she "expand" my break time pula

gosh~ that 3 hours break time what to do?

she somemore ajak go chat with her in the office

if too free ==

not funny at all~

the worst is im gonna have double maths class continuous again this sem

T^T

last sem almost made me condemned

this sem

HWAHWAHWA!

higher level,tougher

n summo again 2gether~

it really make me feel so awful

felt so headache n kinda like not comfortable

in the 2nd maths class...

hoosh~

it will be continue for like 5 months~

just hope that i can tahan that =)

im done with my "rajuk" stuff..haha~

coz i can't get a better solution for that

so why not adapt better for that

i can do it! =)

do better n gets further =)